Remain

 

Sometimes the most difficult "send me" response from the Lord is being told to remain. We crave a deeper, richer, more intimate relationship with the Lord and are ready to be obedient to whatever and wherever He calls us... Then His response is to remain. 

There are so many layers that come to my mind when I think about the difficulty of remaining. 

The first thing that comes up for me is that I can get frustrated when told to remain. It's as if I'm on punishment, I'm being held back (as in not being promoted in school). My heart really wants to do more for Him but yet He instructs me to remain. My mind goes to self-righteous thoughts; what can I do differently, what did I do wrong...all centered on my behavior, performance and capabilities.  Lord, help me see the error in my ways. Titus 3:5 ESV "He saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit".

Another thing I start struggling with is FOMO (fear of missing out) or otherwise known as coveting. So many of these heart issues are so sneaky and let's face it, our culture normalizes them so much that we just accept this is just how it is, and it's okay. It's not. We can't be filled with His true and satisfying joy while coveting. We can't fully open up our hearts and love other's while feeling discontent and comparing. When I meditate on the meaning of coveting, I get clarity that it's the opposite of being grateful. In my view gratefulness is the foundation for worshiping the Lord. 

As I sit here writing this out, it's unfolding for me as well. I feel like the Lord is having me work on being content in these moments of waiting. It's a blessing to be able to have some time and space to breathe, focus on what I'm grateful for and have my joy multiply. In this place I get to learn to rest well in His presence and just be. Which also helps work on eradicating self-righteous tendencies. Not in my power but in His. Not in my knowledge, ability, strength...etc...But in His!

Philippians 2:13 AMP For it is [not your strength, but it is] [a]God who is effectively at work in you, both to will and to work [that is, strengthening, energizing, and creating in you the longing and the ability to fulfill your purpose] for His good pleasure.