A nagging sensation

When the pressure is turned up on us we tend to let our ugly seep all out.  Before moving a wonderfully wise woman shared some bits of experience with me pertaining to military moves.  In a nutshell she told me that I will surprise myself by the ugly things that will bubble up inside of me.  However, she encouraged me in saying that sticking through it and seeking God during those times will benefit the whole family; that heat and discomfort brings about healing.

Bring out the ugly it did.  This was by far the worst move to date.  As I've said previously, if things could go wrong, they did.  Pressure and heat was coming from all directions.  We were being tested, we were under fire, we were in the process of unveiling wounds.

I learned a lot through this move, and I'm still learning.  One of the specific things I'm learning is how nagging, even if I keep it in my head and don't say it, effects me.  I have already learned how important it is to not communicate mostly negative affirmations to those we love because how it affects them and our relationships.  That's already a hard one for many of us to fully get.  We feel justified, we feel like the one wronged because the other person seems to be taking us for granted and thus we become blinded to the damage we do to that person and the relationship we have with them.

BUT, what do we do with all that?  If we control our nagging by choosing our battles and making sure we have a good balance of negative and positive communication, how can we deal with all of these negative thoughts we are having about our loved ones?

I really believe Joyce Meyers teaches so well on this subject and if we practice what she preaches then we really will find victory and freedom.  For one, we need to hold each thought that doesn't align with the word of God captive.  Not putting clothes in the hamper, not offering to help with what we are working on, fill in your annoyance and I doubt that God is telling us to be concerned with it.  Actually, he's reiterating the opposite verse after verse after verse.  Get the plank out of your eye before helping your brother.  Love God above all else, submit to your husband, love your wife, love your neighbor as yourself, spread the good news of the gospel...

So, we know what thoughts are not aligning, now what?  There isn't a cookie cutter specific answer but I can share what I do.  I have a pretty benign example that I don't think my husband would mind me sharing.

A few weeks ago my husband asked me if I wanted to go to Red Rock 

Canyon with him and the kids to do a little boulder climbing and hiking.  

I was surprised because he typically doesn't do these activities and delightfully 

accepted. He and I have differing views when it comes to many things and

 this was one of them.  While there I wanted to stop and enjoy the scenery 

and enjoy myself, and he on the other hand seemed as if he had a point

 A and point B agenda and then it was time to leave.  His focus equated to 

him being quite away ahead of me the whole time.  This has always 

irritated me.  I find it disrespectful and then hurt because I've

 communicated this on many occasions to him but he continues to 

do it (unintentionally most of the time).  So, there I was in a beautiful

place doing something I rather enjoy but I felt anger and hurt starting

to bubble up and out of me.  I started to grumble and felt my mood 

declining.  I realized what was happening and started to pray.  Then 

I started to thank God for all the good things my husband does.  Then I

started to sing worship songs.  Almost like magic, my mood dramatically

improved and our outing was left on a positive note.

So for me, this is what works.  If we just try to stop something without giving it to God and leaning more on him then we miss our opportunity to grow.  I don't want to be dependent on environment and circumstances to have joy.  I want to be like John and praise God in prison (hopefully not literally).